Unexpected Insight

Daughter, in comparing her current work situation with that of her previous, said the following.

“I don’t have to worry about things my coworkers say during break or lunch.  They don’t talk dirty like the women did at my other store.”

I suggested a possible reason.

“Many of the women where you now work are Muslim – at your old store they were Christian, or at least most likely attended church and would consider themselves Christian.”

She paused a moment and then shook her head. She agreed that was probably the difference.  And, a sad difference it was.

As she shook her head, I found myself shaken. Things came to mind that I had said or done, habits I’ve developed….

Deeply convicted by the Muslim women’s devotion to their belief and my own words about fellow Christians, I’ve begun an introspective journey that I hope will lead to a change in who I am and how I am, a greater understanding of myself and deeper appreciation of others.

I am Christian. But, does my behavior reflect my belief?  What of my speech? My lifestyle?

What of your belief?  Do you walk the walk or simply talk the talk?

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Introspect: to look into, look at, see

It’s not a good thing to look too closely, to analyze too severely, to be too critical when looking at and into oneself.

What you see might be more than you bargained for.

And, once you see it you can’t exactly “unsee” it.

So, what do you do about it?

  • Ignore it?
  • Explain it away?
  • Offer excuses?
  • Pick at it?
  • Cover it up?
  • Deny it?
  • Acknowledge it?
  • Own it?
  • Deal with it?
  • Accept it?
  • Take action about it?

Yesterday was my brother’s birthday and in writing the post, I spent a few minutes in introspection as I thought over our childhood together.

A recent move brought me into close contact with my brother, after living out of state for over 30 years, and I’ve enjoyed getting to know the brother who is and remembering the brother who was.

I hope the sister who is differs from the sister who was.

And, I hope he forgives me for sticking the french fry in his ear all those many years ago – and for all the other ways I antagonized him.

Because, I did.  I can call it “sisterly affection” and “desiring his attention,” but when I remove the tags and look at it honestly, I see it for what it was.

Ouch.

Anyway, introspection has a way of bringing the hidden to light – like turning on the bathroom light and standing in front of the mirror, eyes open, taking it all in.  All those little (or big) flaws seem to jump out at you the longer you look. You end up wishing you’d not paused…not turned on the light….

Because, when you “see” you become aware.  And, awareness demands response.

And, whether we want to or not, we respond to what we see.

The question is – How do we respond and is our response one that moves us forward or holds us back?

Scroll up and look again at the list. How do you respond when you become aware?